I could go on a self-soothing rant of cursing, go punch a wall, scream out loud, or cry some more, but that wouldn't make cancer go away or bring back those who have passed.
Cancer is a disease that takes life from your body by destroying your insides, but it doesn't ruin your spirit. The fabulous man who passed this morning, on father's day, was not only a good man to his family, he was a good man to all. There isn't a bad thing I could say about this man - he raised a great son who has the same family values and love his dad taught him to express and have for those important in his life. He supported a wonderful wife, not only with the material things, but with the love, compassion, and tenderness of a true love and marriage. He was a great uncle to his nieces and nephews, as well as a father figure to me during a time of unknowns.
When I found out melanoma was stealing this man from our physical world, I dug out a box of letters that were important to me. In there was a letter from this man who I knew cared for me as if I was his daughter. Although his son and I don't speak anymore, I wouldn't ever wish ill will on anyone, nor would I suppress feelings of concern, sadness, or grief for R and his family. The following letter was written to me at a time I was making decisions to become a confirmed Catholic; a time of great uncertainty for me and a turning point in my life. This letter holds true to this day...
It's said in life that for every action there is a reaction. This only begins to state how positively you have affected our family. You have brought so much generosity, love, and understanding into our lives. I have learned not to take these things for granted and realize how rare you are. It has really been fun getting to know you. By now I'm sure it's clear to you how much R means to us and for you to be his girlfriend, and more, we feel very fortunate.
I'm very pleased and proud that you have taken this step in your religious life to build a stronger relationship with Jesus Christ. As you know you and I are not too different as we both made our confirmation late in our lives. I'm glad it didn't take you as long as it did me. Through God all things are possible. Whenever you are confused, angry, lonely, or lost, turn to God and he will guide you. It took me some time to fully realize this, but we begin to see that as coincidences become miracles we begin to build faith.
I know you are going through a period of uncertainty in your life and career right now but just remember to do the best you can and the rest will always work out. You can't control other people, places, and things so concentrate on yourself. When you keep God close to you he will make your road in life easier to travel.
God Bless You.
Mr. D
Dear God,
You have a great man living with you now - a man of great talent, love, support, and everlasting spirit. Please love him, care for him, and support his family at this difficult time. May peace be with you, Mr. D, and with your friends and family. Amen.
